Simon Palomares
Cruise ship Comedians
Growing up ‘ethnic’ in the late 80s and early 90s had its many challenges.
I was just starting high school, and the attitudes of a mostly Anglo-Saxon, North Shore, all-girl Sydney school were a rude awakening for a curly-haired girl with an unpronounceable name.
Luckily, the ‘ethnics’ (a word used to describe us by our delightful teachers) banded together and took pride in our identity and took ownership of the labels cast upon us. Along with this renaissance of sorts, one TV show emerged that struck a chord with us ‘ethnics’ adding humour and light. That show was Acropolis Now.
Each of the characters were unique and connected with their audience in a particular way. There were girls at school who dressed and boofed their hair like Effie, boys at the neighbouring school who acted like Jim and embarrassing older cousins who were doppelgangers of Memo. (remember the time I bumped into George Kapiniaris on the Spirit?)
And then there was Ricky played by Simon Palomares – the sensible manger with a degree. I suppose I connected with him most; he was level headed and not ashamed of his education. I was a bit of a nerd at school, and so was he.
Imagine my delight when I discovered Simon was currently performing at sea on the Carnival Spirit! His stand-up comedy routine has been a big hit among cruisers, and I hope to one day catch a show. Let me present, Comedian Simon Palomares.
Name: Simon Palomares
Title: Guest Entertainer, Comedian
Current ship: Carnival Spirit
Latest Cruise, length, destination: Carnival Legend, Moreea Polynesia to Maui, Hawaii Next Cruise: Carnival Spirit, Sydney, Noumea (New Caledonia)
When and why did you first become interested in performing at sea?
I got a call from an agent nearly five years ago about a new line coming to Australia (Carnival) with its own comedy club and he was interested in trying me out because I had experience with Australian, British and American audiences so we flew out to Suva in Fiji and I was the first Australian comic on Carnival, hardly any comics were doing ships back then so I ended up on just about every cruise for that first year.
Had you cruised before? If not, what was your first impression? I hadn't cruised before and was a bit worried because I had always been seasick, but that wasn't the case on the bigger liners, I thought the comedy club was great and forced me to develop a lot of material very quickly, made some great friends in that first year.
How is performing on a cruise ship different to performing on land? It’s the only place where you have such a varied audience, on Australian ships you have people from every state in front of you, which never happens on land, the theatres and orchestras are disappearing on land but all ships have wonderful well equipped and crewed theatres.
What are Australian audiences like? You can push your comedy more in Australia. They don’t get easily offended. But they are not as effusive as say Americans - it is harder to get a standing ovation in Australia. They are much more laid back.
What do you enjoy most about being at sea? Anything you dislike? I like the distance from everything else, during the day you can relax, go to the gym, hangout with passengers, I have fallen in love with the job, to be quite honest, it satisfies my passion for travel and cuisine.
How many cruises have you completed? How many do you have left? Do you have a contract? I work on a cruise-by-cruise basis. How many have I done? I’ve lost count, it’s been pretty solid work for the last five years, and I can’t tell you how many I have left, the industry keeps growing and it gets more interesting each year.
Longest number of days at sea? Do you get sea sick? What are your living quarters/cabin like? Longest number of days on board has been 21, because of a strike at a port we were meant to be getting off and changing artists but had to keep going to Sydney and all the guest entertainers had to improvise extra shows. I don’t get seasick, I sleepy like a baby in a carseat. My cabin has ranged from basic crew quarters to full penthouses.
Favourite port or destination? This year I did Antarctica and Alaska, Portofino (Italy) Morocco, Japan and Penang.
What are the biggest misconceptions cruisers have about cruising and cruise entertainers? That we have to pay our airfares to the ship. Always get asked that.
Would you recommend other artists to experience performing on a ship? Definitely, it takes a different level of professionalism and you are able to go to all sorts of exotic destinations by yourself. We also work within a very structured work environment, not a place for divas. The different audiences, ages and nationalities is a great challenge for comedians.
Favourite ship? Carnival Spirit is always like going back to my home ship.
Has any of your family or friends cruised while you were on board? What was their reaction? My son cruised with me when he was 18, didn’t see him for five days.
How would you describe the quality of entertainment in ships in general? Very professional and of a high standard, once you have mastered the cruiseship audiences most other gigs seem a bit easier. Also most entertainers get one, maybe two hours to rehearse a show with lights sound and orchestra before its showtime so you learn to work fast with new people all the time.
How often do you perform? Do you have a favourite show/time of day to perform? On Carnival with the Punchliner Comedy club we do five shows, on other ships two shows in one night in the main theatre, they’re family shows, late night shows on a big stage with an adult only crowd always go off, I mean off!
What do you enjoy doing on your days off? In my first year on Carnival Spirit I completed most of an MBA studying on line. But sleeping and eating are my favourite hobbies, hanging out with other entertainers is always great because now we all know each other and its a bit of a new Vaudeville circuit, we always like to ask who is on what ship to hang out.
Do you get to enjoy port days? Never miss a port day. I have started getting more into video and photography so there is always something amazing to explore.
Any advice for entertainers who'd like to perform at sea? Get a good show together and get out there, good video online is crucial, the decision-makers are on the other side of the world and only have video and show reports to go on.
Final thoughts? Not sure how long I will keep doing this but it’s been an amazing five years, there’s hardly a city in the world now where I don't catch up with someone I’ve worked with on a ship. Writing a novel which should be finished at the end of this year, being out at sea so often touches your soul and changes your view of the world in ways you couldn’t imagine.
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